Yep, it's me!

Well, I’m back! Rather pathetic 2012 effort so far I’m sure you’ll agree. A million sorrys etc. however it really has been ever so difficult getting all land experiences down ‘on paper.’ Life is often paced at a zillion miles and hour but no excuses Scouse is back and I’ll start with a synopsis of the past few months.

Spot and Stripe did indeed turn out to be the best pork meat ever. Quite a bit of it was sold – belly proving to be the most popular cut (people, you are watching far too much Jamie, Nigella and that dreadful Saturday Kitchen. Yes the belly’s fashionable but…yawn…like, everybody’s eating it right now…) and the sausages were delicious. I was amazed at how much meat 2 pigs produce to be honest and I think we probably broke even on the whole experience, much richer for having our own meat. For the first time DD asked for seconds at Sunday roast when we had a piece of shoulder and she’s very proud of Spot and Stripe! We must educate our children better with the food chain!

We are all geared up for another go with pigs, this time with hard standing! For those that remember the sheer disgusting mud mess S&S produced, DH and I found a solution and got some concreting done. The new pigs will now have a ‘patio’ and sundeck and a path from ark to water and food. We, (more importantly) will have a route in to change bedding and water etc. Having wanted 3 weaners it looks like I’ll have to settle with 2. We went back to Oaklands Pigs (yes they are on the web for those nosy about such things), as the quality of the meat really was superb. However, seems like in these tight times everyone’s trying pig keeping and I could only get 2 on order for end of this month! Pig adventures however will soon resume! Horsley salivating at the prospect…!

The ducks live and lay on. I just haven’t got round to incubating any eggs and they are fickle broodys so at the minute it’s just take and eat. They remain crazy creatures and I’m still unsure about Pongo’s sexuality but they are pretty low maintenance. The biggest issue at the moment with them is keeping the rats out of the area at night. We have traps but it would appear the Isfield rat population is eating at ‘land de les canards.’ I’m still aiming to get some chickens too but hoping to keep them up near the house. The thing preventing me is the sheer ludicrous cost of a decent chicken ark. I’m sure there’s a solution somewhere (and no, I don’t make my own – I have nails you know.)

Now the sheep. Well….they have had the biggest news to tell and writing all this makes me slightly guilty for not sharing it with you as it happened. The week after the Grand National in April (timed to perfection) Dors decided to labour. She chose the coldest, wettest day so far to do it and she chose the only 2 hour period we didn’t check on her (we had been checking almost hourly for the previous week) to give birth (ironically we hadn’t checked as we were enjoying some S&S pork.) DH and DD found Dors standing up with lamb underneath as he drove past! A wonderful sight tinged only by the dead lamb on the ground too. We tried reviving it but it was too late. An experience we put down to nature and as I have learned often the hard way, nature doesn’t have to explain herself. However Dors was and is Mum extraordinaire and Tilly the lamb thrives.

A week later, practically to the minute Dolly gave birth to twins Bessie and Belle. We were one step ahead and had put her in the barn the night before as she was acting oddly (you see, scouse does farming!) It was only around 3 weeks earlier that we’d realised she really, actually was preggers! Whilst Dors was always as big as the proverbial bus, Dolly was pretty slender and developed none of the udders Dors did. It was only my experience one morning in the rain (always these things happen in the rain) on finding Dolly upside down that I found out. Panicking and assuming she had been struck by lightning or some other far fetched event (I even thought she might have gone into labour then common sense hit me – for once, and I realised even sheep wouldn’t labour on their backs legs akimbo) I called my trusty, patient farmer up the road. His wife answered and holding back the sniggers, trying not to make me feel an inch big, beautifully told me “heavily pregnant sheep can often beach themselves. Just pull her up.” Lesson learned…ways to make a fool of yourself in a village #258 achieved. Go me.

So baa-ing (sorry!) a few dramas like getting Tilly to suckle with the aid of google on my iPhone in one hand and trying to milk a sheep with the other resulting in a squirt in the eye for me but success for Mum and lamb. Oh and losing a lamb separated from Mum in another field ending with a 45 minute sheep chase armed only with my ‘sheepdog’ Labrador (more interested in the rabbits) and the knowledge that I was already very late for a meeting and would be turning up possibly with eau de sheep on me. In fact by far the worst event with the sheep this year was when Rosemary got flystrike (this wretched weather creating mega amounts of horrid flies) and that was a Saturday night spent as a family catching her, penning her, wrestling with to the ground (surely and Olympic exhibition event waiting to happen) whilst DH hand sheared her and scraped the maggots out her. Plenty of retching at the smell of rotten flesh et al but it makes you appreciate your livestock much more when literally saving their lives and I’m pleased to say she made a full recovery thanks again to our farmer friend who oversaw the operation and loaned us his shears and gave us some flystrike spray. Good people in life are worth everything.

Everything’s a balance always and we made a family decision to holiday in Marbella last month rather than attend the smallholders show at Ardingly. Well, can you blame us? I needed sun and heat and was looking positively English white. The weather has been utterly dire and has and is presenting us with much more work and disappointment. Strawberries, raspberries and apples are all suffering terribly and our fields look like wild meadows – plus side for the wild flowers around here but bad for the vital pollinators of them. We’ve got swallows nesting in our garage at the moment, having their second go at breeding after the first clutch of eggs didn’t hatch due to the female dying. I feel and fear for our farmers in what has been a tough year. I also fear the price of hay this winter!

On the downside of all this we got broken in to on the field and some equipment stolen. Honestly, some people are scum and scum is found anywhere aren’t they? But, the scouse in me will always maintain never to let the b**tards get you down in life.

More updates soon – promise! And sorry, this has been a bit more than a synopsis and no doubt you’ve missed your chance to get Olympic tickets on the website! Incidentally, for all those trying, keep trying. I had the fortune of going twice with a Paralympic trip coming up and it’s so worth it. 

Weather: Damp but muggy. 21 degrees.